What’s an ugly baby?
An ugly baby’s what I call a property with big potential. Ugly babies need a complete home renovation, a serious makeover.
- It’s the ugliest house on the best street, without a shred of curb appeal.
- It’s the unloved apartment that could be divine.
- It’s probably old, certainly shabby, and hopefully threadbare.
It’s Jenny from Forest Gump when she’s in her scary drug addict phase.
It’s the kid from Into the Wild when he’s all hairy and scrawny and you just want to give him a sandwich and send him back to people who love him.
More specifically?
An ugly baby is a ‘before’ property many would never consider – but one that they’d fight to buy ‘after’.
On the surface, it’s all knotty pine and shag pile carpet. Beneath, it’s full of heart, soul and sunshine.
- My first apartment needs a haircut.
- It needs clean underwear.
- It needs to wipe off 6 nights’ eyeshadow, smeared this way and that.
- It needs a serious wallpaper detox.
- It needs to get down off the railing, and take a cold shower.
- It needs a mother’s love.
Why an ugly baby?
Because we can’t afford a pretty one. Vancouver property? It wants you to bleed.
What is not an ugly baby?
Put it this way.
- Mick Jagger’s ugly on the outside and pure genius within. You’d jump at the chance to meet him. He’s an ugly baby.
- Heather Mills? Ugly outside and pure evil within. You’d run a mile. A very a bad idea.
An ugly baby’s ugliness must be cosmetic only.
Ugly babies don’t include:
- Former grow-ops, crack dens
- Condemned buildings
- Properties requiring structural work or major repairs
- (Read my 5 house hunting rules)
What do you do with ugly babies?
You need to love ugly babies, and treat them with patience. Add some hard work and unrelenting chaos – then ugly babies become prize-winning beauties.
Now what? Don’t miss a minute. Follow our ugly baby’s total renovation- subscribe now (or get email updates) as we completely renovate the ugliest home in Vancouver.
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Forest Gump photo found here, Into the Wild photo found here.
